B.C. couple explain why they haven't removed hostage-taking cats from blender box
Like all epic stories, this one starts quite simply, beginning with the delivery of a blender in a box.
“I brought it inside,” Jessica Gerson-Neeves says. “And set it down for a quick second.”
Enter the Langford, B.C., woman's cat with an appropriately heroic name.
“Anaximander Reginald Ramiel,” Jessica’s wife Nikii Gerson-Neeves says. “But we just call him Max.”
Max jumped on top of the un-opened box in the middle of their kitchen and wouldn’t get off.
“And that was the beginning of the end!" Nikii says.
Jessica posted a picture of Max on the box on a Facebook group, calling the situation “Breaking news” of a “stand-off” with “details to follow.”
“I woke up the next morning. The post had 10,000 interactions,” Jessica says.
And the box with the blender still inside? It was now being held hostage by a second cat, Lando Calrissian.
Max was looking up from the floor below, seeming indignant after being usurped.
Their third cat, George Destroyer of Worlds, was sitting beside them, poised for action. Jessica took a picture and posted a follow-up.
“Again, people lost their minds,” Jessica says of the increasing amount of feedback from followers expressing appreciation for the post and an appetite for more updates.
So on the third day, when George Destroyer of Worlds assumed the seat of power on top of the box, Jessica shared the latest chapter in the saga.
“It really took on a life of its own,” she says.
The couple have been sharing daily posts ever since, featuring Jessica’s comic commentary.
“A compulsive need to narrate it like a demented David Attenborough!” Jessica says.
They document power plays for the top of the box ranging from sedate nudges to furious feline fisticuffs.
“It’s a bit of a struggle for dominance,” Nikii says. “And they will start throwing paws.”
There’s also been unexpected twists in the story, including an article about the feline fiasco in the Washington Post, and the Vitamix company sending empty blender boxes to try and woo the cats away from the original.
“By the next morning, Lando was on the original Vitamix box and Max was very politely in line behind him [waiting] for the original Vitamix box, while the decoy [was beside them] unoccupied,” Jessica says. “It was hilarious.”
The epic continues more than a month later.
Tens of thousands of people are following the saga of the still unopened, never-unoccupied blender box. And yes, Jessica and Nikki know they could just move the cats.
“We’re having fun. The cats are certainly having fun. So many people are having fun,” Jessica explains. “The blender will still be there when this runs its course.”
“Things are dark, so find joy where it lives,” Nikii smiles. “And right now it lives in our kitchen on top of a Vitamix box.”
CTVNews.ca Top Stories
Pedestrian, baby injured after stroller struck and dragged by vehicle in Squamish, B.C.
Police say a baby and a pedestrian suffered non-life-threatening injuries after a vehicle struck a baby stroller and dragged it for two blocks before stopping in Squamish, B.C.
Demonstrators kicked out of Ontario legislature for disruption after failed keffiyeh vote
A group of demonstrators were kicked out of the legislature after a second NDP motion calling for unanimous consent to reverse a ban on the keffiyeh failed to pass.
Tom Mulcair: Park littered with trash after 'pilot project' is perfect symbol of Trudeau governance
Former NDP leader Tom Mulcair says that what's happening now in a trash-littered federal park in Quebec is a perfect metaphor for how the Trudeau government runs things.
RCMP uncovers alleged plot by 2 Montreal men to illegally sell drones, equipment to Libya
The RCMP says it has uncovered a plot by two men in Montreal to sell Chinese drones and military equipment to Libya illegally.
Government agrees to US$138.7M settlement over FBI's botching of Larry Nassar assault allegations
The U.S. Justice Department announced a US$138.7 million settlement Tuesday with more than 100 people who accused the FBI of grossly mishandling allegations of sexual assault against Larry Nassar in 2015 and 2016, a critical time gap that allowed the sports doctor to continue to prey on victims before his arrest.
Man wanted in connection with deadly shooting in Toronto tops list of most wanted fugitives in Canada
A 35-year-old man wanted in connection with the murder of Toronto resident 29-year-old Sharmar Powell-Flowers nine months ago has topped the list of the BOLO program’s 25 most wanted fugitives across Canada, police announced Tuesday.
Doctors ask Liberal government to reconsider capital gains tax change
The Canadian Medical Association is asking the federal government to reconsider its proposed changes to capital gains taxation, arguing it will affect doctors' retirement savings.
Pro-Palestinian protests roiling U.S. colleges escalate with arrests, new encampments and closures
The student protests of Israel's war with Hamas that have been creating friction at U.S. universities escalated Tuesday as new encampments sprouted and some colleges encouraged students to stay home and learn online, after dozens of arrests across the country.
Tabloid publisher says he pledged to be Trump campaign's 'eyes and ears' during 2016 race
A veteran tabloid publisher testified Tuesday that he pledged to be Donald Trump 's 'eyes and ears' during his 2016 presidential campaign, recounting how he promised the then-candidate that he would help suppress stories that had the potential to harm the Republican's election bid.