With many students heading back to school in the Atlantic region Tuesday, a children's psychology expert is sharing advice on what can be a stressful time for young people.
Dr. Lindsay Uman, a clinical psychologist with the IWK Health Centre in Halifax, who specializes in treatment for anxiety, says her biggest piece of advice for parents as they prepare for the new school year is “preparation.”
“We want to remember it’s really normal for kids, and honestly for parents too, to feel some anxiety with going back to school, especially if they’re starting school for the first time," said Uman. "So I think just normalizing that, that it’s OK to have anxiety, it’s OK to talk about it, but really helping to prepare kids.”
Uman says parents should tell their kids what to expect at school, as the unexpected can cause and fuel their anxiety. She suggests telling them what their day will look like, who their teacher will be, and showing them pictures of their school.
While it may seem like children are either excited or anxious about returning to class, Uman says they can feel both emotions at the same time.
“Sometimes, it can feel like we have to pick one… for most kids, the anxiety will be there and it will usually last a few days, sometimes a few weeks for some children. So for most kids, that anxiety will taper off, they’ll start to be replaced more with excitement and getting back into the routine.”
Uman adds that there is a smaller subset of children whose anxiety persists beyond a typical period of a few weeks and they need some additional help.
“And the good news is, there is a lot of help out there to help children and parents with dealing with that anxiety,” she says.
Uman says that help is available at the IWK, through private clinicians, and community resources.
“The Community Health Teams put on a really great free workshop a couple of times a year called ‘My Child Is Anxious, Should I Worry?’ that parents can just sign up for. There’s an Anxiety Canada website that has some really great resources for back-to-school,” Uman says. “If you know where to look, there’s a lot of really great resources out there.”
The first few days of the back-to-school routine can take some adjustment for families. Parents online have suggested keeping their evenings and weekends low-key to minimize stress -- something Uman agrees with.
“It doesn’t mean you have to stop everything. If you already have something planned, or something that your child is really looking forward to, I wouldn’t necessarily cancel that,” she says. “I think if there is something there that you could take off the plate just to let them have that time to unwind at the end of the day that’s going to be really helpful and set them up for the most success for the next day as well.”
Uman says even if children are experiencing anxiety, it’s important to make sure they still go to school and stay for the whole day.
“The one thing we definitely know about anxiety is that our instincts to want to avoid and it makes us feel better in the short term… but it really, unfortunately, makes things worse in the long term. We really want to empower the children. Even if you have a hard day, instead of giving that reassurance of ‘it’s all going to be OK,’ it might be helpful more to problem solve with them,” she says.
“As tempting as it is to go pick them up early, or to keep them home one more day, I’d really advise against that. Cause usually, over a couple of days, that fear will subside.”
